Today

Today I almost skipped church .. since all of this stuff with Liza it has been easy to say ohh it is just easier to stay home... Well today in the last 30 minutes before church I decided to get us ready.. After we sat down .. Liza's birthdad sat down infront of us .. He lives in a group home .. I don't think he even can recognize us .. really no threat.. but still the blood in my veins ran cold.. I hugged my sweet little girl.. looked at Bruce and said I can't do this.. he only smiled and said GOd has his reasons ... you will be fine.. I am so amazed at my husband.. he is so calm with some things. while I wanted to scoop up my kids and run.. He wanted to just sit there..
Well birth dad never knew who we were .. it gave me time to sit .. and try to see the similarities in the two.. also made me think about our future.. he has some really big issues.. that could be passed down.. in the end I found myself praying for him and for the innocent little girl next to me..

Later today I ran into some people from the past who were very toxic for me .. and I again thanked God for my life now...
Then I ran into someone who was part of placing Liza with us .. while some stuff was really handled poorly ... I still thanked God for it all ... Life may not have moved like I would have chosen but we still ended up with 2 great kids that call us mom/dad....